Monthly Archives: August 2011

C.H.U.M.P. Wants To “Take Back ‘Merica!”

"We're regular people taking this country back! Getting re-elected is not what we're about; we'll just get enough of us in there just long enough to give 'em a swift kick in the balls that'll smart for decades!... We're gonna steamroll right over Washington like a big firey snowball!!!" [read more...]
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Boehner Proposes A Tax on Obama

"I said attacks, not a tax! ATTACKS!" said a more-than-usually red-faced and unhappy House Speaker John Boehner on the stairs of the Capitol Building yesterday, to anyone who would listen. "Jesus, clean the crap out of your ears, will ya, America?" he shrieked in apparent conclusion before running down the avenue in a very Jerry-Lewis-like fashion, weeping like a little girl. [read more...]

Green Sharks & Spam

I heard that sharks have such huge powerful jaws in order to compensate for the tiniest penises in all the animal kingdom…and I heard this from a blowfish, and they should know, right? The Sabre-Toothed Tuna [read more...]
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Climate Change Hoax

Rush Limbaugh can see it even if you can't: An immense, invisible "heat dome" secretly placed upon The Earth by shadowy forces to purposefully make this summer seem especially warm, perhaps alarmingly so [read more...]
in Church & State on

Turning Japanese

The recent discovery of a collection of haiku only recently attributed to Ryk provides a glimpse into the life of the reclusive author. From as early as childhood, Ryk apparently harbored a competitive streak that would pulsate within the protagonists of his later works... my favorite game | siege of the purple tower | I always triumph [read more...]
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Tacos

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  in Music on